Men Stopping Violence seeks to stop abuse before it happens

Elise Covarrubias, CEO of Men Stopping Violence (MSV), said she worked 15 years with an agency that provides services to women who are victims of abuse. Such organizations, she said, provide a valuable service to the community; however, they are not enough to address the societal problem of violence against women.

“It’s essential that we find ways to stop this violence before it happens. We have to work with young men and help them learn how to have healthy relationships with the women in their lives,” she said.

MSV, Covarrubias said, primarily serves DeKalb County but is expanding to serve other areas of the metropolitan area. Budding and Brewing, an event planned for May 11 at Wild Heaven Beer West End Brewery and Garden on White Street in Atlanta, is designed not only to raise funds for MSV, a nonprofit organization, but also to increase awareness of the organization and its work. For details visit menstoppingviolence.org/buddingbrewing/.

Young Men Stopping Violence (YMSV), a program within MSV, “was created to empower and mobilize high-school-aged male students to become leaders in intimate partner violence prevention and advocates of women’s rights,” Covarrubias said. “The program is designed to equip participants with the skills necessary to build healthy interpersonal relationships and become ambassadors of anti-violence within their communities.”

Covarrubias explained that “violence” does not necessarily mean physical violence. Exercising inappropriate control over another through demeaning language, financial constraints, monitoring their movements and relationships and other such behaviors can be forms of violence.

She said that some young men never learned to have healthy relationships with women because they saw poor role models or no role models among the men in their families. “The society itself is somewhat to blame for perceptions of what it means to be a man. From music, television, and movies to peer pressure to what people say without really thinking about it— influences all around them— [and] may give young men the wrong ideas about how they should behave toward women,” she added.

YMSV was created in response to the growing teen dating violence statistics within the United States and in Georgia, Covarrubias noted, citing the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention 2019 Youth Risk Behavior Survey, which found that one in 12 high school students who had previously dated reported experiencing physical or sexual dating violence. “Girls reported higher instances of dating and sexual violence: 16.6 percent reported experiencing sexual violence, compared to 5.2 percent of boys,” she said, adding that YMSV designed the program to educate young men on teen dating violence and begin reversing the trend.

“Men Stopping Violence works to dismantle belief systems, social structures and institutional practices that oppress women and children and dehumanize men themselves,” the organization’s website states. “We look to the violence against women’s movement to keep the reality of the problem and the vision of the solution before us. We believe that all forms of oppression are interconnected. Social justice work in the areas of race, age, gender, and sexual orientation are all critical to ending violence against women.”

Mark Bracey, MSV director of community and youth programs, said it is especially important that boys and young men hear the MSV message from other men. Bracey, who lives in DeKalb County, said many of the young men he works with are Black and may be more willing to listen to someone who looks like them.

“Mark provides them with a valuable role model. He knows how to talk with them. He gives them T-shirts and makes the sessions fun experiences. The boys feel they are in a safe place; it’s an overall positive experience,” Covarrubias said.

The overall goals of the project are to lower instances of intimate partner violence—teen dating violence—among teenagers in the Atlanta metropolitan area, raise awareness of gender-based violence and its prevalence, and develop ambassadors of anti-violence trained in bystander intervention, she continued.

Covarrubias said just as peer pressure can have a negative impact, young people also can benefit from having peers challenge words or behaviors that reflect an unhealthy attitude toward women. “While women clearly benefit from programs such as ours, men benefit as well. They learn to be better partners, better people, and better community members.”